If you know me, you know that I face a constant struggle with the pull I feel as I fill the shoes of three different people while only having one body. Sound strange? I find myself switching between three different frames of mind all throughout my days. As I went for my morning run, I was aware of the fact that I thought about my mom duties, my homework, as well as my work at the hospital.
With my school work I face the most horrible fear... getting a... B!!!! I am actually laughing at myself as I type this because I know that this way of thinking is silly to most "normal" people. I am not sure when I developed this behavior either. I used to be very content walking away with a B in undergrad. Maybe I am just more mature??? Ha! I am also faced with accounting this semester, and I am the type of person that if I see a word problem with numbers I freak out. I am taking this semester as yet another learning experience and definite challenge. Maybe I can become "normal" again by the end of the semester!
My work at the hospital is extremely important to me. If you knew me in college, you know that I had very hard time picking a major. (In fact, I had at least four or five! Remember when I had to take an art class???) Well, my broad outtake on my career has payed off. I truly enjoy human resources. For me and my Gen Y tendencies, if I can still say that I enjoy something after doing it for three and a half years, that is saying something. I had the opportunity to attend a user conference in Atlanta, GA on Monday and Tuesday for Halogen software. (This is a software we use at work. I'll spare you the details.) I was really thankful for this conference, because I needed the reminder of why I went into human resources in the first place. Fresh out of college I remember wanting to read books like "HR from the Heart," and it is easy to lose that fire after a while. Being reminded of true talent management this week gave me perspective once again on one of the reasons why I chose the HR field. I love to be developed, and I want to develop others!
Though I feel pulled in three different directions, my most important job at the end of the day is being a mom. Watching Bailey grow and begin to communicate with me has been amazing. I often wonder how in the world she knew what to do by the words that I used. She is very smart!!! :) (I know a lot of mothers say that about their children, but she really is!) We went to an orchard today, and I decided to let her walk on her own. She actually followed me and listened to my directions. This was a very proud moment for me as a mom. I know that the next time we go out she may wander from me and throw a fit, but days like this give me hope that I am doing something right. Scott and Bailey had a great time together while I was in Atlanta. I am thankful for a husband that can take on the "mom" role when I am not able to.
I know that my mom role is where my true priority lies in this season of my life. Though I love learning and being a student this season will come to an end in May. The season at work is just that too, a season. I am blessed to have the ability to work part-time in a job that is my career. Even though I sometimes get the urge to take on the world of human resources and dive in head first, I know that in this season I am where I should be. For me, true success at the end of the day is putting my selfish ambitions aside and developing Bailey into the person that God wants her to be.
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